fly away
by laveniis
Summary: this wasn't his home, this wasn't his world


Shou slowly lowered the pistol, shaking nervously. He had just killed a comrade. It had been an act of revenge, for how they betrayed Shou and his fellow comrades. He had to do it, he knew and so he had to follow with their code of conduct. Yet, why did he feel like he had done something awful? He was used to killing and seeing the dead, but.. this was different. Maybe it's because this person had always been nice to him, had smiled and been his friend. He only ever killed enemies under Delun's instruction. But he did this without Delun's decision, he killed a comrade who had betrayed them. And he felt like a monster.

He heard footsteps. They were moving quickly and had a sound of authority to them, and he knew it was Delun. Shou's arms shook and the pistol fell to his feet, and he just turned his head to look at Delun pathetically as he entered the room. He watched as Delun's eyes moved from him, to the gun to body lying in a pool of blood a few metres away. He looked back at Shou seriously moving forward and standing over him.

"What happened?" he asked softly, voice calm. Shou bit his lip and clenched his fists, still quivering.

"What does it look like?" Shou spat, angry at himself and frightened. "I killed them."

"But.. why?" Delun asked, confused. Shou hated that. He never seemed to show any emotion in situations like this, just confusion or amusement. "What did they do for you to kill them?"

"They were a spy, Delun.." he whispered. "I caught them communicating with a military unit. They were going to lead them right to us and ambush us." Delun shook his head.

"How terrible," he mused, walking past and Shou and kneeling beside the body. "Well, they should have known they wouldn't have gotten away with it. They're lucky you killed them and not me-"

"S-Shut up.. I killed… them.. Delun," he muttered, tearing up. "I killed our comrade. I'm a killer, a monster-"

Delun stood and moved to Shou, taking him into his arms. Shou rested against him weakly, sniffling.

"That's the life of a pirate, my dear." he said softly, ruffling his hair. He didn't know how to handle a situation like this. It was new to him. If it was anyone else, he would have told them to toughen up. But Shou was his love, so he could not treat him in such a way.

"If murdering friends is the life of a pirate.. I… I don't want it," Shou uttered, trying to stop crying. Delun closed his eyes. Shou was his love, and he hated to think of him being sad all the time now. Maybe he would be happier away from all this. He always had a feeling Shou wasn't cut out for this. He'd see remorse in his eyes sometimes after raids, even if it was someone bad. And now, Delun felt remorse, for turning Shou into a murderer. This was his fault. Remorse was a strange feeling, one he did not enjoy. Although, he didn't enjoy many emotions. They were just trouble in his eyes.

"Do you really mean that?" Delun asked softly, pulling away from Shou and looking seriously into the younger man's green eyes. Shou seemed to hesitate, thinking of how to word his answer. Delun knew what he was going to say.

"Yes. Of course I do," he said softly, wiping his eyes weakly. "Delun… I don't belong here. I really don't."

"Then what happens to us?" he asked vaguely, looking to the wall. Shou looked at his feet.

"I suppose.. we continue on. In our own lives." Shou mumbled sadly, holding Delun's hands weakly. "I really love you Delun. You really get me, you've done so much for me.. but your world is not meant for me. And I am not meant to be here. It feels wrong, y'know?"

Delun felt such a strong pain in his chest. Something so foreign to him, it was painfully overwhelming. Is this what Shou felt as well? Was this true sadness? It hurt more than any wound. He found himself crying, something he had not done since he was a small boy. He hated it, he felt weak and pathetic. Shou put his hands on Delun's cheeks, wiping away his tears, trying not to start crying again himself.

"How amusing," he laughed to himself, staring at the ceiling and away from Shou. "Kid, I don't know why you let yourself cry all the time. It's unpleasant." Shou snorted and kicked his leg lightly, making Delun grin.

"I don't cry all the time, and I'm not a kid!" he whined, a small smile on his face. "Its only natural, Delun. It'll be okay, you'll recover. I promise."

"Are you sure? It feels worse than being stabbed," he complained, putting his hand on Shou's head and messing up his hair. "Well, I suppose I should say something," Delun sure was a vague guy. Shou tilted his head. Delun took Shou's hands.

"You're the first person I ever came to love," he said softly, struggling to make eye contact with him. "You're amazing Shou. I hope you're happy wherever you go next,"

He reached up into his hair, pulling out his signature hair-tie. It had a lotus on it, and it's what made him who he was. He pushed it into Shou's hands.

"Keep this and continue to remember me. Look back on your time here fondly. Know that you're always welcome here, and I, and Zhu, and everyone will always welcome you back here." he said softly, making sure Shou took it.

"And of course, if you ever need my help.. just send an SOS on that phone of yours, and I'll be there." Delun smiled, ignoring his tears.

"Thank you… I… I…" Shou was crying like a baby. "I love you so much Delun. I always will, okay? You'll always love me too, right?" Delun rolled his eyes.

"What a stupid question to ask, you dumb kid." he scoffed, trying to act like a tough guy. "Of course I'll… love you. I will always love you, Shou. I'll keep you close," he put his hand on his heart. "Here. I won't forget you."

Shou took off his necklace, one that had a sharktooth on it. "I don't have anything significant, but… you can keep this. Its my favourite." he smiled, putting it in Delun's hands. Delun nodded and tucked it into his pocket.

"What are you doing?" Delun scoffed after a few seconds of awkward silence. "Get out of here, get going! Go find your new life!" he jokingly shouted, shooing him. Shou laughed softly and nodded his head, taking off running to where his little plane was kept on their giant ship. Delun probably chased him half way there, shouting at him to get off his ship, and Shou insisting he was leaving as quickly as he could. Once Shou had entered the room, Delun came to a stop and just smiled sadly, unable to hold back emotions anymore. He wished he didn't have to let him go, but he loved him. And he couldn't force him to be where he didn't belong.

'If you love something, set it free.'

Delun supposed that was true, however, he never thought he'd have to do that. He put his hands in his pockets and turned, ready to continue on with his life.

Shou flew far away, not looking back once. He didn't want to think of any of it anymore, because now that he had left and he knew he wasn't going back… it made his heart ache.

But he supposed it was fine, because he was moving on. He was going to find where he belonged.

But he'd always love Delun, no matter where the wind took him.

And Delun would always love him.


End file.
